As you know that I had such great fun visiting my friends heart, brain and eyes, I thought that it is pertinent at this time to sort out my issues with liver who (as you know) was upset with me since the break-up vodka incidence. As you all know that I am a brave individual! That's why after just three dozen brainstorming sessions, 63 panic attacks and 27 nightmares, I finally mustered the courage to knock the doors of my not so good but vital friend LIVER! 

Here are the excerpts of what happened there.




Me: Knock knock knock...

Liver: (heavy voice) YES.

Me: Knock knock..

Liver: (outlandish voice) YESS!

Me: Knock.

Liver: (outrageously shrieking voice) Who the hell is out there?

Me: (freaked out) eeeeee!!

Liver: What!!

Me: (clearing throat) Meeeee... (managed to add M to my previous sentence) 

Liver: (opening door) YOU!!! What a surprise. Captain Liver reporting Sir. Where is the bottle??

Me: Hehehe (unsuccessful attempt at adding humour to my fear). You are so funny!! No bottle here. I just came to see you my friend.

Liver: As far as my memory goes, you have visited me mostly during saturdays and that too with a bottle of vodka. 

Me: Ahhhhh??? (I wasn't prepared enough to answer such satires from Liver)

Liver: Anyway. Don't you worry? No complaints. I have forgiven you for that break-up marathon vodka session. 

Me: (breathing easily) Thank God. I was terrified that you will still be angry at me as I gave you a torrid time during that phase.

Liver: It is said that forgiveness is the biggest virtue. I took some time to realize it. But as soon as you missed two saturdays, my senses finally found my address and made me realize that hatred is like an empty vessel that makes a lot of sound but is hollow from inside. 

Me: How sweet of you Liver. Anyway, why did you say Captain Liver reporting? This is not an army I guess.

Liver: (Loud short laugh) Ha! Don't you know that I am the captain of your internal organs. I am the largest organ  (after skin) and one with maximum regeneration capacity. I affect almost every physiological process of your body and perform over 500 chemical functions. In other words, I am the captain of your internal organs. You can't sustain more than 24 hours without me. You take me for granted because I don't bother you with physical symptoms when I face minor to moderate discomfort due to your inappropriate misuse. It is good for you in the sense that you don't have to feel the pain that you give to me. But every blessing comes with a flip side. If you continue to ignore my well being, then the first warning that I give to you might well be the last warning that you will ever get from my side. You got to take that into account. Hoping that you will correct you misplaced assumptions and immature behavior, I decided this time to give you another chance without bothering you. I filter over a liter of blood every minute. It wasn't that difficult to filter my anger.

Me: (feeling much better) Of course dear. You are such a superstar (buttering wasn't that bad a proposition  under the circumstances)! But I am really sorry for my irresponsible behavior. Please accept my genuine apology. 

Liver: Deliver your apology quickly for I have to leave for a party.

Me: Party!!! What kinda party? 

Liver: My dear friend Brain is throwing a party. I gotta catch that.

Me: Wow. That's great. I didn't know that you guys also celebrate. How do you party?

Liver: Well, my good friend Heart plays the bar tender if you like to call him so. He supplies extra blood to all of us. He takes all the pain of pumping extra blood to make us feel happy and gay. Heart is a really nice guy. 

Me: Yeah I know that. By the way why is Brainy throwing the party?

Liver: A friend of mine had an infection. We managed to take care of it quite well in the end. As usual, I aided the immune system in battling the infection and other organs and systems supported in their own way. 

Me: Okay. Who is your friend?

Liver: Don't you know him? He lives in the abdomen apartment. His name is Mr Intestine.

Me: Of course I know him. But why is Brainy throwing the party? I mean Intestine should throw the party? Is Brainy a party animal?

Liver: This has to be the joke of the millennium. It is  the Brain that separates you from animals and you are calling him as a party animal! Sometimes the most superficial gestures carry the deepest feelings that are beyond the horizon of words. Probably that's why he's throwing the party.

Me: (Faking to understand his philosophy, I repeated my question) Okay!!! But my question is.. why Brainy throwing the party in place of Mr intestine?

Liver: (Taking a deep breath) Well, let me tell you in the language you understand. Due to bacterial infection and subsequent bowel disturbances, every system was affected including my friend Brain who had to suffer with frequent headaches. Moreover, all of us just love Mr. Intestine. So I guess it is a way of  Brain to show his love and care to Mr Intestine.

Me: Why do you guys love Mr. Intestine so much. I mean what so special about him?

Liver: That's not a difficult question. Just take a second and you will realize.

Me: (After taking a minute to think about a possible reason, I confidently replied) Okay. What???

Liver: (deep sigh in frustration) Come on man! Who has to deal with all the shit throughout your life?

Me: Oh Shit!!! I almost forgot.

Liver: You guys think that "shit happens"!! But let me assure you that it doesn't happen that easily. You got to meet a constipated man to learn the other side of it.

Me: I hope Mr. Intestine doesn't know about my careless attitude. 

Liver: I hope the same. He'll be hurt. You already serve him too much of spicy stuff for his comfort. 

Me: Oh boy! The more I talk to you guys, the more I feel bad about myself. You guys care for me so much and I take you for granted. I am such a dumb horse.

Liver: I agree with you this time, at least with the dumb thing. But I would rather choose another word synonymous with an animal of the horse family to elaborate your dumbness.

Me: Haha.. I got your silly point. Anyway, before I leave, let me ask you another question. Are you single or.. you know what I mean?

Liver: Of course I do. Single or mingled? Well, I am not fortunate enough! I have a girl friend.

Me: Wow, that's great!

Liver: Yes it is. She lives with me. I make juice for her that she stores inside her.

Me: Juice?

Liver: It's called bile juice. She is very emotional and kind. She supplies it to Mr Intestine for digesting fat. You got to thank my lady wooing abilities for it is because of our love affair that you manage to digest all that fatty stuff that you keep on engulfing.

Me: Wow man. You guys have left me speechless. The support, care, and coordination that you show with and for each other is just amazing. You guys perform your own functions with utmost dedication, show concern for the welfare and well being of each other and live in perfect harmony. Even if we could learn and achieve 10% of what you guys perform effortlessly and selflessly, the world will transform into a dreamworld. You guys have touched me in more ways than one. I promise you of a sincere effort to learn something from everyone of you in order to turn into a sensible and responsible human being from a dumb horse that I am now. You can substitute the word of your choice for horse, but I assure you that I intend to stick to the rest of my promise till I fulfill it. See you again my friend. It was a learning and fulfilling experience visiting you. Bye for now.






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30 Responses so far.

  1. This is the fourth part in the series. I hope you guys like it.

  2. I have thoroughly enjoyed this series! I always learn something interesting, and this one taught me that the liver filters a liter of blood per minute. That's fascinating, and it underscores why liver health is so vital. I'm a big proponent of milk thistle for liver health, and I admit that I have fallen off the wagon lately with supplements and healthy eating. I know that within 1-3 days of taking milk thistle, I feel an almost immediate difference in appetite, in cravings for junk food (decreases substantially by the first day w/ taking milk thistle daily), and with better sleep patterns. You'd think that knowing that would've encouraged me to stick with what I know works for me, but I got lazy last year. This is another good reminder to get back on track.

    Happy New Year, Deepak! :)

    - Dawn

  3. shovonc says:

    Your thought process is very strange. I likes.

  4. jayadevm says:

    Hi Deepak

    Brilliant! The working of the liver is conveyed so well and in an engaging way. I wish we had more teachers in school who taught science, history and math in this fashion.

    Keep up the good work. Must read the other articles in this series.

    Best regards

  5. Hi Deepak, This was the best of all. The punches you manage to weave through such a sensitive article speaks a lot about your writing skills. Actually we never realize that all our organs work in unison to make this body keep alive. Can't we do the same to keep humanity alive. You left me with so much to ponder over!

    Enjoyed it thoroughly. You should think about publishing this series. Waiting for more!!

  6. Bikramjit says:

    now now this post made me smile, I guess i shud start looking after my liver , with my drinking habit it has to work overtime every saturday for sure :)

    Bikram's

  7. Anjan Roy says:

    Wow...another Very knowledgeable piece presented with so much simplicity...i must say your work with our body is awesome...it not only gives information that we miss in day to day life but it add up an interesting story to not make it mundane...Loved it a lot

    Whom are you Visiting Next?

  8. What an interesting way to give us this information-very unique & hilarious too.

  9. wonderful work.....
    funny and knowledgeable...!!
    well done....it was worth reading

  10. A superb write up.... very insightful.
    It is also humorous in more ways than one!!!
    "Sometimes the most superficial gestures carry the deepest feelings that are beyond the horizon of words" this line actually left m contemplating.
    Apart from giving facts in a simplified and enjoyable form...it has a meaning that touches the very fabric of humanity..
    I took pauses while reading this work of yours....could imagine it as so real...the fear in the beginning...the humor...satire...pun which has been so well presented..and ofcourse the message that it sends.
    HATS OFF 2 u Deepak.... now i have more reasons than one to say that you are one of my favourite writers! :)

  11. Thanks Dawnie.. You always come with wonderful insights.. It is always a pleasure to have you here.. Happy New Year dear.. Take care and keep visiting.. :)

  12. Hi shovonc.. That's the strangest comment i have read in sometime.. i am glad you like my writing style.. do visit again..

  13. Thanks Jayadevm for going through.. Do read the other parts of the series.

  14. Thanks Indu and Bikramjit for coming.. You are always welcome to the blog.

  15. Hi Swati.. It's heartening that you found it heartening to read.. do keep coming dear..

  16. Hey Anjan.. I always treasure your feedback.. thanx for reading.. I haven't planned the next visit yet. You never know!

  17. Thanks Kislaya.. your comments have made my day.. your insightful comments echoed by sentiments in the most beautiful way.. I treasure your favourite writer tag.. Thanx a million..

  18. Hey Meenakshi.. you are a skillful writer yourself.. i a really glad you like this post.. thank you so much for your wonderful thoughts.. I hope humanity will come up with a strong response to the chaos we are living in..

  19. Simply superb, I loved it thoroughly. Would be more interesting if it was pictorially presented(just a suggestion)Visit[http://www.toondoo.com/].

  20. AmitAag says:

    Wonderful! Unique! What an idea sir ji!!

  21. Ha...ha...ha..
    This is amazing Deepak..wonderful!

  22. Meenakshi.. haven't thought about publishing yet.. but you never know..

    Thanks Ajeeth.. that is a good suggestion indeed.. but its difficult to get pictures for this idea..

    thank you Amit ji.. you are always an encouragement to do well.. :)

    Awvdhessh.. you are welcome to the blog.. i hope to see you more.. i am glad you like it..

  23. loved it...but why mr intestine its ms intestine..cutei intestine..

  24. ha ha... chaudhary.. har jagah ms dhundhta rehta hai..

  25. Gosh I really had to scroll down far to tell you that this is absolutely awesomely creative and entertaining... Anatomy of liver wasn't that nice a thing to study back then ... but gall bladder as a girl friend man! thats creative and amusing ... i actually laughed at certain points ... thanks for adding me today else I would have missed the fun posts ...keep up the great work !!!!

  26. Interesting write up...informative yet fun.

  27. sahe says:

    loved the line " filter 100 litres of blood, so i can easily filter the anger".. when someone has a passion for writing, it reflects in their work.

  28. Thank you Nidhi for your feedback.. I am glad I could evoke some laughs. See you around buddy. Great to see you here.

  29. Thank you Bhavana for reading. I hope to see you more dear.. :)

  30. Hello Sahe. I am thoroughly glad that you could see the passion in my work. Can't thank you enough buddy. Thanks a million.

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